Is the Grass Really Greener?

I led a parenting workshop this past weekend on Finding Mommy Bliss and one of the things I talked about was “Loving Perceptively, Here and Now”–not getting so caught up in the schedule of mothering that you lose sight of the blissful moments right in front of you, in the present.

As I was going through my archives here just a few minutes ago to find a post I could put up for Mom-Monday (because I haven’t had time to write one), I came across the one below–my very first blog post from March, 2008…  and it struck me. I wrote the post when my kids were 7 and 9, and I remember the feeling I had as I typed the words about their toddler and baby years… a feeling of nostalgia and “ahhh… those were the days.”

And here I am, years later (just like I predicted), my kids now 11 and 13, and I’m reading what I wrote with that same feeling of nostalgia–that the days of having a 7 and a 9 year old were “the days”… simpler, calmer, easier.

But isn’t human nature like that?

Us, always looking ahead with anticipation and reflecting on the past with longing,

yet often losing sight of the magic and beauty right in front of us, here and now?

As I read what I wrote, I found myself smiling and nodding,

because I was reminded all over again

that the grass is green and lush and beautiful

right where I’m at today. :)

Have a beautiful day, moms, and enjoy the bliss!

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*post below originally published 2008

Is the Grass Really Greener?

I recently had a conversation with a friend that made me think of the saying “the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.” We were talking to each other about how busy life is and I was telling her how hard it’s been for me to get some writing time in every day. Between drop-off and pick-up and sports and school and everything else in between, it’s hard to grab those precious few hours where I can get on my computer and actually accomplish something. Literally, I’ve been leaving my laptop on the kitchen table and grabbing fifteen minutes here, twenty minutes there, whenever I can.

“But, you’re lucky,” my friend said. “At least you have something you’re passionate about, something you’re working on. I feel like I should be doing something too.” Believe me, this friend of mine does a lot—she has twin four-year-old boys. Between swim lessons and preschool and trying to keep up with her boys’ boundless energy, she barely has time to come up for air.

After we got off the phone, I thought about what she said. I thought about the days when my son and daughter were toddlers. The days when I was so immersed in potty training and binkies and temper tantrums that I had little time to even think about all the writing I wanted to do. But there were sweet memories, too. So many of them. Those were the days when our homework was making cookies for class. The days my kids napped and I wasn’t running in and out of the house a hundred times for drop off or pickup. The days we’d spend at the park playing with friends…

When I think back…ahhh…those were the days.

Here my friend and I were, in different stages of our kids’ lives, each of us thinking the grass was greener on the other side of the fence.

Something tells me I’ll look back on this time of my life and sigh too.

Years from now, when my kids are driving and dating (gulp), I have a sneaking suspicion I’ll look back on these times–when my daughter still holds my hand walking home from school and my son still wants me to read to him at night–and think ahhh….those were the days.

I don’t want to miss what’s happening today because I’m too busy looking to the future or reminiscing about the past. I don’t want to miss one single second of the wonderful life I’ve been given.

I want to appreciate it.

I want to hold my daughter’s hand a little tighter and read to my son a little longer. I want to give my husband a sweeter kiss when he walks through the door. Because the grass I’m standing on is green and lush and beautiful, right where I’m at.

Sometimes I just need a little reminder.

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Comments

  1. Emily Montez

    My dad used to say “the grass is greener on the side you water”.  Thanks for the reminder to nurture our relationships with our kids in the here and now, exactly where we are.  Beautiful post and thanks for the linky!  I am sharing this with my MamaFusion foxy mamas!

  2. Susan

    I love your post — so many times I’ve found myself admiring the grass somewhere else, too.  What a lack of appreciation for the gift of TODAY I’ve shown!  It takes a will to do that, for me, and I’m thankful for your reminder.

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